Do you have a longing that doesn’t leave you alone?
Year after year, you promise yourself that you’re going to get to it when you have more time, more money, more something.
Time after time, you think of starting. Maybe you even begin. And then, for some reason, you turn the other way.
Or, you don’t give it your all.
It’s too hard.
Now is not the time.
There’s so much on my plate.
You tell yourself all of this and go on about your life.
Until one day, your longing starts knocking on your door again.
And then the whole cycle repeats itself.
For me, one such longing was the desire to write and to share more of my writing with the world.
At first, I wrote but didn’t share anything with anyone.
Then, when the longing persisted, I started writing a blog.
I wrote and shared. I loved it. But then it got scary.
So I stopped.
After that, I spent almost a decade in inner turmoil.
Until I couldn’t take it anymore.
I decided to figure out, once and for all, whether I was going to write or not.
I was done with the turmoil.
Something needed to change.
Over the years, I’d sought help with writing. Read books. Taken courses. Joined a writers’ group.
But nothing had set the writer in me truly free.
And then came my spiritual teacher.
And I was ready too.
The stars finally aligned.
I went as deep as I needed to go and resolved the inner conflict from its root.
Now, I am free to write.
I write joyfully and without much drama.
When it gets difficult, I step away and come back to it.
When I don’t have time for it, I make time for it.
If there’s too much on my plate, I get rid of other stuff so that I can write.
See, it was never a matter of time or difficulty.
It was a matter of me being afraid.
And not trusting that I could stay standing in the face of any mistake I made.
It was a matter of me loving myself unconditionally – even if I failed.
Even if I was a terrible writer.
Even if I had nothing useful to say.
It was about me learning to have my own back – no matter what.
And once I learned to do that, things got easier.
The fears are still there but I know how to put them at ease.
They no longer get in my way.
I no longer get in my way.
But you know why all of this was possible?
Because the longing was so deep, it could only come from my soul.
And I’ve learned to trust the callings of my soul.
I have always known that the one thing I’d regret most on my deathbed would be not sharing more of my writing with the world.
I am here to write.
It’s an essential part of my journey.
If my journey ended without writing, my life would be incomplete.
And I don’t want that.
What are you here for?
What is your soul’s longing?
What is the thing you will regret not doing when you die?
If you can, I implore you to listen to that longing.
Do everything in your power to fulfill it.
Read books. Take courses. Seek help from other people.
Don’t let life go by.