“How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.”
– Annie Dillard
When I returned to Canada after spending over two months with family and friends in India, I found myself a bit listless and disoriented. The kids went back to school. My husband resumed his routine. But even though there was a lot for me to do, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Aware that this state of affairs wasn’t sustainable and I wanted to start participating in and enjoying my life in Canada again, I turned to the book Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (pronounced me-high cheeks-sent-me-high.)
Csikszentmihalyi was one of the founders of the field of positive psychology. He spent decades studying the kind of experiences people from around the world reported finding the most enjoyable in their lives. The state of being in flow is a state of deep, effortless enjoyment. We enter flow states when engaged in activities that challenge us without overwhelming us. Have you ever found yourself so deeply involved in an activity that you completely lost track of time? That’s a flow experience.
I have long known about how important flow experiences are for my well-being. But in my listlessness after returning to Canada, I wasn’t sure how I could intentionally create flow in my life when I didn’t feel like doing much. Thankfully, the book provides some concrete guidance.
The Components of Flow
According to Csikszentmihalyi, flow experiences frequently have some or all of the following components:
1. Flow experiences often happen when we do tasks we have a chance of completing
2. We must be able to concentrate on what we’re doing
3. The task has clear goals
4. The task provides immediate feedback
5. We are deeply yet effortlessly involved in the task and temporarily forget about everyday worries and frustrations
6. We exercise a sense of control over our actions
7. We are not self-conscious in any way – we temporarily forget about our sense of self
8. The sense of duration of time is altered – hours can feel like minutes and minutes can seem to stretch into hours
A combination of these elements is what creates a sense of deep enjoyment or flow experiences.
Finding my Flow
The moment I looked at my listlessness from the lens of these components of flow, I knew what was getting in my way. While there was a lot that needed to be done at work, I hadn’t come up with clear, concrete tasks I could complete and feel a sense of progress/accomplishment. I was missing elements 1 (tasks we have a chance of completing,) 3 (clear goals,) and 4 (immediate feedback.) Armed with this information, I set out to find flow.
A couple of days ago, I picked up a specific, achievable task: plan my itinerary for a conference I will attend in October. I started looking at flight options, stay arrangements, and the money I was willing to spend. A couple of hours later, I had come up with an itinerary, yes, but I had also set up two calls I had been putting off for no good reason. The rest of my day felt more joyful whether I was cooking or spending time with family. The next day onwards, things became more enjoyable. I got back to writing and feeling enthusiastic about work.
Interestingly enough, I shared the eight components of flow with a coaching client yesterday who wasn’t motivated to complete some important tasks at work. Like me, her main issue was getting started, and looking at the breakdown of flow experiences helped her come up with a concrete next step.
Over to You
So, how might you use this information to make your life more enjoyable?
1. Pause and reflect: if you look at a typical day in your life, would you say you are enjoying your life? In other words, are you content with how you usually spend your time?
2. If yes, wonderful! You are no stranger to flow experiences and I am happy for you. If not, can you use the elements of flow to find a simple, clearly defined task or activity that sounds enjoyable? You might already know what puts you in flow or you may have to think about past experiences you deeply enjoyed. It could be engaging in one of your hobbies or doing an activity at work that requires concentration or having a fun conversation where you are fully present. I am almost certain you can think of something that creates a flow experience in your life.
3. If you want greater enjoyment in your life, commit to spending some time in the next day or so doing your chosen activity. If your experience is anything like mine, the momentum that comes from being in flow will go far beyond that specific activity.